day four

first problem. I lost my mother fucking cigarettes. That I JUST fucking got.

second problem, everyone I associate with. My friends always stress me out, I didn't even realize it until I got out.

one of them doesn't seem to care at all.

the other CAN care, but choses not to.

the other, only care when he has to, otherwise it's just easier not to.

like, for some reason they all irritate me, theyre , annoying, maybe isn't the right word but idk. It's hard to see why I'm friends with any of them.
I love them, don't get me wrong, just they piss me off.

ugh, and like ): I'm just upset and I wanna cry at mark cause I missed him so much and he's the only one I didn't really talk to yet. I got to see ethan and nikk right when I got out and we hugged and it was cute and there were tears or joy and shit. Idk.

and when I did talk to you for like 5 min, we were both busy and I couldn't really say what I wanted to say. And I feel like your really mad at me or something, and I got your message and that indirectly ment alot :/

idfk. I feel so different than I did before, I feel like rhat fucking place changed me, idk if it's good or bad.

then there's HER! Were not even gunna get into it. Enoigh said.

and then this other chick who does nothing but bitch at me whenever I get on myspace. I love the girl, don't get me wrong. But if nothings gunna happen, I'm not gunna waste my time hurting myself by trying to be her friend.

I wish I had my other friends. I wish I had cheynne. Robert. Jake. Michale. Lundy. They'd know what I should do. I wish I could ask them.

I wanna go back. I'm sick of the shit I have to deal with when I'm here, I'll find a way to go back. :/ I need too.